Monday, February 09, 2009

Who is Jack Shit?

Who is Jack Shit?
The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says "You don't know Jack Shit." Now you can intellectually handle the situation.
Jack is the son of Awe Shit and O. Shit. Awe Shit, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Shit, the owner of Needeep N. Shit Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn Jack Shit married Noe Shit, the deeply religious couple produced 6 children: Holie Shit, Fulla Shit, Giva Shit, Bull Shit, and the twins: Deap Shit and Dip Shit. Against her parents' objections, Deap Shit married Dumb Shit, a high school drop out.
However, after being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Shit divorced. Noe Shit later remarried Ted Sherlock and, because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name.
She was then known as Noe Shit-Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Shit married Loda Shit and they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken Shit. Two other of the 6 children, Fulla Shit and Giva Shit, Were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Shit-Happens wedding. The Shit-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Shit, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Shit.
So now when someone says, "you don't know Jack Shit," you can correct them

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